T'was the month before Christmas

T'was the month before Christmas
When all through our land,
Not a Christian was praying
Nor taking a stand.
Why the Politically Correct police had taken away,
The reason for Christmas - no one could say.
The children were told by their schools not to sing,
About Shepherds and Wise Men and Angels and things.
It might hurt people's feelings, the teachers would say
December 25th is just a " Holiday ".
Yet the shoppers were ready with cash, checks and credit
Pushing folks down to the floor just to get it!
CDs from Madonna, an X BOX, an I-pod
Something was changing, something quite odd!
Retailers promoted Ramadan and Kwanzaa
In hopes to sell books by Franken & Fonda.
As Targets were hanging their trees upside down
At Lowe's the word Christmas - was no where to be found.
At K-Mart and Staples and Penny's and Sears
You won't hear the word Christmas; it won't touch your ears.
Inclusive, sensitive, Di-ver-is-ty
Are words that were used to intimidate me.
Now Daschle, Now Darden, Now Sharpton, Wolf Blitzen
On Boxer, on Rather, on Kerry, on Clinton !
At the top of the Senate, there arose such a clatter
To eliminate Jesus, in all public matter.
And we spoke not a word, as they took away our Faith
Forbidden to speak of salvation and grace.
The true Gift of Christmas was exchanged and discarded
The reason or the season, stopped before it started.
So as you celebrate "Winter Break" Under your "Dream Tree"
Sipping your Starbucks, listen to me.
Choose your words carefully, choose what you say
Shout "MERRY CHRISTMAS," Not "Happy Holiday!"
@Sent by Tommy Wilkerson

GUFFAW FODDER

Little Carol came into the kitchen where her mother was making dinner. Christmas was coming up and she thought this was a good time to tell her mother what she wanted. 'Mom, I want a bike for my Christmas.'
Now, Little Carol was a bit of a troublemaker. She had gotten into trouble at school and at home. Carol's mother asked her if she thought she deserved to get a bike for Christmas. Little Carol, of course, thought she did.
Carol's mother, being a Christian woman, wanted her to reflect on her behavior over the last year, and write a letter to God and tell him why she deserved a bike for Christmas. Little Carol stomped up the steps to her room and sat down to write God a letter.

LETTER 1
Dear God:
I have been a very good girl this year and I would like a bike for Christmas I want a red one. Your friend, Carol
Carol knew this wasn't true. She had not been a very good girl this year, so she tore up the letter and started over

LETTER 2
Dear God:
This is your friend Carol. I have been a pretty good girl this year, and I would like a red bike for Christmas. Thank you, Carol
Carol knew this wasn't true either. She tore up the letter and started again.

LETTER 3
Dear God:
I know I haven't been a good girl this year. I am very sorry. I will be a good girl if you just send me a red bike for Christmas. Thank you, Carol

Carol knew, even if it was true, this letter was not going to get her a bike. By now, she was very upset. She went downstairs and told her mother she wanted to go to church. Carol's mother thought her plan had worked because Carol looked very sad.
"Just be home in time for dinner," her mother said.
Carol walked down the street to the church and up to the altar. She looked around to see if anyone was there. She picked up a statue of the Virgin Mary, slipped it under her jacket, and ran out of the church down the street, into her house, and up to her room. She shut the door and sat down and wrote her letter to God.

LETTER 4
I got your mama. If you want to see her again send the bike!. Signed, You know who
@Sent by my "little sis", Carol Richardson
~~~~~~
All my relatives know that I refold the wrapping paper from my Christmas presents for use later.
"Aunt Jane," asked one of my young nieces, "why do you save all that paper?"
"I'm doing what's best for the environment," I replied. "So I'm recycling this paper."
But then my daughter pipes up, "Good thing you didn't ask that question five years ago ... then she was just plain cheap."